10. You’ve treated a child’s ‘owie’ with something you got from the vet.

9. There’s a blue corduroy jacket in your closet that doesn’t fit very well.

8. You’ve been to Paris (Missouri), Prague (Oklahoma) and Havana (Kansas).

7. You figure a taste of your wife’s short ribs would cure the most radical vegan.

6. The vet, the parts guy, the co-op manager and the sale barn are in your phone contact favorites.

5. You’ve traipsed outside in your underwear and cowboy boots at 2 a.m. to check whether or not you shut the gate.

4. You use a front-end loader like other people use a ladder.

3. You are often part of less than 2 percent of the population hoping for a rainy weekend.

2. A vehicle coming down the road stops all work ‘til you see who it is.

1. Entertainment just doesn’t get a heckuvalot better than a monkey in a cowboy outfit riding a dog.