10. As you’re driving it away, the farmer you bought it from high-fives his son.

9. There’s a copy of the Serenity Prayer in the owner’s manual.

8. The serial number is written in black magic marker.

7. There’s no GPS but there is a compass duck-taped to the cab.

6. You have to memorize a five-step starting process that involves a hammer and pulling on a length of baling wire.

5. When you go to haul it home, you have to park the trailer downhill because it won’t quite make it up the ramp.

4. The black exhaust smoke regularly brings the rural fire department to where you’re working.

3. There’s a custom rack on the side where you can mount an oil drum.

2. Who would’ve thought tires that look like that would actually hold air?

1. The reason you saw no warning lights before the loud noise is because they don’t work either.

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