10. The guy bidding against you at the farm sale is stricken with a weird temporary paralysis.

9. Your lender calls and, because of a computer glitch, they actually owe you money.

8. It rains once a week on your beans and corn but skips meadows whenever hay is down.

7. Two order buyers who don’t like each other square off over your calves.

6. That horrible noise from the combine cures itself and you can rock-on through the field.

5. Finally, you sell your corn at the year’s peak and buy your fertilizer at rock-bottom.

4. The ranch horse you bought is younger than he was supposed to be, broke better, gets over his gimpiness and sheds off roan in the spring.

3. The neighbor down the road retires and wants you to have his place with nothing down and no interest just because you’re a heckuva nice guy.

2. The neighbor’s fence-hopping ex-bottle calf herd bull manages to steer himself en route to your heifer pen.

1. Your wife suggests a two-week vacation of hitting every sale barn within 100 miles.

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