10. The preacher has to explain to the farmer that, no, it’s not exactly like forward contracting.

9. The bride is laboring under the misunderstanding that the hip boots on the gift table are some sort of joke.

8. Prior to the service, people are comparing weather forecasts.

7. There are several feed trucks in the parking lot because, well heck, you have an afternoon wedding and you have to expect people to chore on the way.

6. During the ceremony, the best man’s cell phone beeps with a text message that says, “SELL SELL SELL.”

5. A tear of joy runs down the banker’s cheek because the bride has a good job in town.

4. The organist can’t help slipping a little honky-tonk into “Here Comes the Bride.”

3. Two front-end loaders hold the newlywed get-away car 10 feet off the ground.

2. The boys from the sale barn offer toast after toast because, well some of those guys just really like to toast.

1. Nothing says romantic honeymoon like a trip to the World Pork Expo.