10. You can tell by the nice clean puddle underneath the tractor that oil has been changed regularly.
9. What’s she need four teats for — she’s only going to have one calf.
8. All you’ll have to do is drive these calves past some corn and they’ll gain weight (well, probably).
7. So the fenders have rusted off — less weight, better performance.
6. Well, I guess you’ll be able to sneak up on this ol’ cow from one side and she’ll never see you coming.
5. There’s a lot to be said for having a combine nobody wants to borrow.
4. Any sow that can make a crippled-up ring man jump a 6-foot fence is gonna be a heckuva mother.
3. This is a one-in-a-million calf — actually, according to USDA, he’s one in 40.6 million.
2. Every cowherd needs one like this just to keep the cowboys awake.
1. Having three legs may spoil the horse’s looks a little but you’ll save 25 percent on your shoeing bill.