10. People still talk about the monster in flowered boxer shorts and cowboy boots somebody saw walking from the barn.
9. Could it be the “Go Away” carved in the pumpkin on the porch?
8. The 5% off beef halves coupons just don’t thrill the kids like they used to.
7. Between the coyotes, the screech owls and the just-weaned calves, it’s just a little too spooky.
6. Town folk are still getting over “Children of the Corn.”
5. The lady at the door seems nice enough but some guy in the background is yelling, “Tell ‘em to get a job and buy their own candy.”
4. The arthritic old cow dog on the porch sounds like the hound from Hell when you wake him up.
3. The screams from within are probably in response to the weather forecast, the market report or a call from the broker.
2. The candy corn they give out turns out to be real corn.
1. Too darned far between houses.