10. The neighbor’s ex-bucket calf yearling bull of unknown heritage is way too puny to settle the heifers he jumped in with last week.
9. The market absolutely has one more rally in it before your note’s due.
8. You have a good dozen miles left after the gauge hits “E.”
7. Hug the uphill side of the wet spot and you won’t get stuck.
6. Even on a cool morning, that ol’ bomb-proof gelding doesn’t have an ounce of buck left in him.
5. Don’t weaken and the one-horned brockle-face cow will veer away from you in the sorting pen.
4. A piece of twine ought to hold your busted trailer gate until you get that crazy cow to town.
3. No point in having the vet check a bull as virile-looking (and expensive) as the one you just bought.
2. The guy across the sale ring is going to nod one more time so you won’t have to regret bidding on those knothead snotty-nose calves.
1. You can take your wife at her word when she says she doesn’t want anything for your anniversary.