Farm Talk

December 10, 2013

The Top Ten things you don’t want to hear from your tractor mechanic

Mark Parker

Parsons, Kansas — 10. That’s the first time I’ve seen every single diagnostic code pop up on the computer.

 9. Looks like a combination of hungry rodents and operator error.

 8. It’ll probably be spring before we get to it — not this spring, the one after that.

 7. Don’t you have the app that tells you the tractor’s about to burst into flames?

 6. But we did get the cup holder fixed.

 5. My advice, next time get one of your grandkids to show you how the GPS stuff works.

 4. No, we didn’t raise the step, you’re just getting shorter.

 3. We sold that tractor to a guy from Alabama — you sure that was your tractor?

 2. Listen, if you want to sell this thing, my brother-in-law collects antique tractors.

 1. We’ve got the new guy working on it — the man was an absolute whiz with golf carts. £