by Mark Parker
Parsons, Kansas —
10. Your new high-tech baler’s alarm is going off but it’s unclear whether you’re out of twine, due for service or in the path of a tornado.
9. After getting the forage quality test back, the county agent suggests you might just want to skip the hay and feed the net wrap.
8. The clacking sound the baler was making last year is now so loud you can’t make out what the talk radio guy is saying.
7. You have to decide whether to shoot for optimum sericea quality or maximum johnsongrass quality.
6. Turns out the fog hovering over the stack is actually smoke.
5. The gophers have been building speed bumps.
4. The implement dealership mechanic seems to think that “heavy-duty” doesn’t include mowing off little hedge trees.
3. The weatherman said there was a 50 percent chance of rain so it rained on the hay you had down and didn’t rain on the hay you just fertilized.
2. The forecast calls for rain, the hay is ready and it’s your wedding anniversary—whichever way you jump, there are consequences.
1. Bees—lots of bees.