by Mark Parker
Parsons, Kansas —
10. All of a sudden, everybody thinks you’re rich, including your wife who has upgraded her home improvement wish list.
9. The equipment dealership is sold out of combine hopper extensions.
8. Your landlords call to inquire why the heck you don’t get yields like that every year.
7. It’s going to take some time to recover from the depression brought on by the fact that you decided not to sow any wheat last fall.
6. With all that stopping to unload, harvest is taking about twice as long as normal.
5. Spilling wheat on the ground is a lot more depressing than it used to be.
4. There’s so much straw out there you may have to strap every piece of scrap iron on the place to the planter so you can get your beans in.
3. More wheat, more trucks in line at the elevator, more time for an idle mind to get into trouble.
2. You can’t remember what variety you planted in that way-way-above average field.
1. Eighty-bushel wheat, 20-bushel equipment. £