10. Since he pushes the cart like he drives his pickup, it’s rare to make it out of the store without hearing “Clean-up on aisle...”

9. He’s always whipping out his calculator to figure his share of a loaf of bread.

8. He just can’t stop himself from telling the nice lady who’s buying buck-an-ear-corn to feed the squirrels that she’s an idiot.

7. As much as he complains about the grocery bill, his eyes get big and he wants everything in sight.

6. He uses the shopping cart to herd other shoppers to the beef case.

5. Even though he’s been trained to wait in line at the elevator, he has no patience in the checkout line and has a tendency to rear-end other shoppers.

4. He tells the kid sacking that he’d be willing to swap a nice unbroke 2-year old for the groceries.

3. It’s more than a little annoying to hear him talk about how his mother used to bake her own bread, didn’t use cake mixes and cut up chickens herself.

2. He looks at the bill, looks at the checker and says, “Don’t I get a cap?”

1. He loads grocery sacks just like he loads sacks of feed.